Updated: Mar 9
If I told you that by eliminating ONE word from your vocabulary would increase your confidence and decrease your anxiety and depression, would you stop saying this word? The word that you need to eliminate is..... *drumroll* the word: SHOULD That's right, should is the WORST word in the English language and one you need to stop saying. Why is the word should so dangerous? Well, our thoughts become our feelings, feelings become actions, and actions create our future.
The word SHOULD shows us our lack, failure and mistake and floods our mind of these negative thoughts. As soon as you think you're failing, lacking or making a big mistake, the feelings of guilt, shame and regret fill our bodies, mind and soul. Now answer me this, what kind of actions are you going to take filled with guilt, shame and regret? What kind of future is that going to be? So how do we eliminate the word SHOULD out of our vocabulary?
# 1. Observe
How many times do you say should in a day? What sentences come after the word should? I really want you to spend 1 day tallying up all the SHOULD's you tell yourself out loud and in your mind.
#2. Us a Substitute
1. Replace Should with Could, but
Usually when people use the word should, they are talking about something they feel they need to do but really don't want to. The easiest way to stop saying should is by replacing it with Could, But. Here is an example: I should be going to more networking events. I COULD go to more networking events, but I'd rather network online.
2. Focus on the Benefits
Instead of focusing on what you should do, focus on WHY you want to do it. Example: I should exercise more. I feel great when I exercise. I love how strong I feel after a good work out.
3.Use Your Power Words
A power word is a word you use to guide you through your self talk and choices. My 2 words right now are: Gratitude and Joy. So here's an example: I should be a better mom and play more with my kids. I am so grateful for my children. I feel so much joy when I play with my children.
Practice using the substitutes. It takes time to change our inner dialog.
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